Tuesday, January 17, 2012

The Beginning of the End

Today, January 17, 2012, I begin classes in my last semester of college. Where did the time go? People always tell you that college will fly by...

In a sense, I would say that it's completely true. It feels like the time has completely escaped. In another sense, it feels like high school was yesterday.

But I guess there's really nothing to do about it now, right? The best I can do is be thankful that I got to experience it all. It was definitely not what expected college to be. I am not the person I had expected myself to be. Things turned a completely different direction. But you know what? I am so glad it did... I am so happy I can't even stand it.

In the next couple weeks I'm going to be going to an open house at Cordon Bleu in MA, a certificate culinary and pastry arts school. Things are getting real, and it's scary as hell, but awesome.

Valentine's Day is coming up... this will be my first ever year with a Valentine. I have always loved the holiday, despite the obvious loneliness that accompanied it especially as I got older. I don't know what it is about it, but Valentine's Day has always had a special place in my heart. When I was little, I think a lot of it was the sudden rush of candy into my possession. As I reached my teens, I became aware of how it served a time for people to slow down and show their significant other that they truly care for and love them. I yearned for that so deeply...

Now, it's finally my turn. Now, I won't get to spend the actual holiday with Steve since it's a weekday and being as we're in a long distance relationship the circumstances just don't allow, however the weekend before we will celebrate. Honestly, I don't care what we do. We don't have any plans yet (that I know of, that is), but all I care about is that I get to spend as much time as possible staring into his eyes. Those bright beautiful blue eyes...As much time as I can laying in his arms... running my fingers through his hair... listening to him laugh... watching his dimples when he smiles... feeling his heart beat.... watching him breathe...I just want him. That's all. All I ever wanted was to be in love with someone as I am with this boy. I cannot even express how much I love him, and how much I am completely and wholly grateful that at the end of the day, I get to call him mine. <3